358K views · 9.4K reactions | Confidence is built thru a deep connection and trust to your body and its cues. When you attune to and validate a child's interests and internal states, you teach them that what goes on in their body is trustworthy, allowing them to spend less time monitoring themselves and more time freely exploring the world. Love on.  | Attachment Nerd | Facebook
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The approach we use to teach our children socially appropriate behavior creates specific neural memories and patterns for them. If we use punishment as our primary teaching tool, it weaves shame, fear and pain into their neural networks. Their brains and bodies will link these painful emotions to the experience of getting feedback. Learning=pain. These neural networks then get activated in adult relationships making it hard to be receptive to change or to be receptive to feedback from people in
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The human brain is relationally regulated. This is most true in childhood but continues throughout our whole lives. While guidance and boundaries are a huge part of our job as parents, they are only effectively received when we have done our primary job first. As an attachment figure in our children’s world they need us to help them feel seen, heard, understood and supported so that their fear and pain reactions can calm down enough for them to process and rationalize. Reach before you teach and
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