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Estrangement doesn’t end because a parent says “just get over it” or “family is everything.” It doesn’t end because they want a holiday photo or because they suddenly feel uncomfortable with the distance. Healing only begins when the people who caused harm become safe enough to come back to. And safety is not sentimental. It’s not performative. It’s not a “we love you and miss you” text. Safety is accountability. Safety is truth-telling. Safety is the end of secrecy, control, gossip, triangulati

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This topic is so nuanced. When I’m out in the woods I am always reminded of how no one is running around with yard waste bags or those big leaf vacuum machines and everythig works out just fine. But our yards are not natural areas so some adjustments may need to be made, depending on what we’ve planted there. Most of my plants can come up through a pile of leaves but I do remove some of them in certain areas, where I want to see small bulbs coming up or I’m worried about some things not being ab

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